Therapy for Self-Esteem
in Washington, DC
Do you find yourself…
Constantly criticizing yourself over past mistakes
Feeling like a fraud or imposter in your classes or work environment
Doubting your skills and abilities
Talking negatively to yourself
Experiencing feelings of sadness, guilt, shame, and anger that negatively impact your daily life
Struggling to maintain positive relationships with yourself and others
You’ve accomplished your goals and succeeded through challenges, but you still don’t feel good about yourself.
This disconnect may be from low self-esteem, where previous experiences influence how you see yourself.
How Does Low Self-Esteem Develop?
Self-esteem is how a person feels about themselves, their actions, and their behaviors throughout their daily lives. Self-esteem affects the decisions that individuals make, how they recognize their strengths, how they show kindness to themselves, and how individuals move through past mistakes. Low self-esteem develops through negative core beliefs and rules that impact how we behave in our relationships with ourselves and others.
Negative Core Beliefs
Core beliefs are a person’s most central ideas about themselves, others, and the world. When an individual's core beliefs are harmful they can lead to negative thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Harmful core beliefs may include statements like I am weak, I am unlovable, No one likes me, I am worthless, and I am stupid.
Rules & Assumptions for Ourselves
Rules and assumptions are guidelines for living, standards for performance, rules for navigating the world, that form around our core beliefs. For example, the rule I must work all the time, or I will fail may form around the belief I am stupid.
Unhelpful Behaviors
These core beliefs and assumptions then impact how we react in moments where they are triggered. This might look like avoiding applying for jobs we’re qualified for, underperforming in school or work, or attribute one’s success to “luck” rather than skills and strengths.
If this sounds familiar, know that like any pattern, it can be changed.
Healthy self-esteem patterns allow us to think about ourselves in a balanced way, accepting both our strengths and weaknesses so we can make decisions aligned with our values.
Self Esteem & Mental Health
Self-esteem is not a mental health disorder, but it can both contribute to other disorders and show up as a symptom of them. Understanding the relationship between self-esteem and life transitions, anxiety, depression, and PTSD can help us recognize how self-esteem is playing a role in our daily lives. Through this understanding, we can then begin to navigate how to address our low self-esteem.
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Beginning college or graduate school, moving away from home for the first time, or starting a new career are exciting opportunities, which also come with a new set of challenges. New situations often mean increased chances for mistakes, and when these mistakes do not meet the expectations we have for ourselves, it can be easy to start viewing ourselves in a negative light.
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Anxiety can show up as worry and doubt. What if I mess up? What if they think less of me? What if I fail that exam or presentation? These questions may start to impact your self-esteem when they begin to affect the beliefs that you have about yourself. A fear about failing an exam can start to turn into a belief that you aren’t smart enough. These beliefs will make combating future anxiety that appears on exam or presentation day even more difficult.
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Depression can make fighting negative self-talk even more challenging than it already may seem. When we are feeling the symptoms of depression, it is more difficult to find the positive in everyday life, let alone in yourself. Depression can make it easier for you see the things you “got wrong”, reinforcing beliefs like I’m not good enough, causing self-criticism to increase. Additionally, self-esteem can reinforce the idea that individuals do not deserve to be happy, exacerbating depressive symptoms.
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Individuals with PTSD may view themselves in a different light after traumatic events in their life occur. They may feel vulnerable, unsafe, or blame themselves for what happened, even when it was out of their control. Trauma may also impact how individuals trust their body, judgment, emotions, and instinct. They may find themselves second-guessing decisions or assuming that something is wrong with them, causing their self-trust to vanish.
As a therapist specializing in working with college students and professionals, I understand how the pressure to perform and constant comparison can impact your self-esteem.
My support can help you gain perspective on your unique situation and allow you to see yourself from a different, more empathetic lens.
Through therapeutic work, I work with clients to help explore how core beliefs may be impacting their self-esteem and work towards a healthier, balanced framework for themselves.
In Therapy for Self-Esteem, You Can Learn To:
Feel proud of your achievements
Acknowledge and appreciate the qualities that make you unique
Feel more secure in your relationships with yourself and others
Create more balanced and healthy expectations of yourself
Feel more confident in school, work, and social environments
View feedback as an opportunity for growth rather than judgement
Therapist Book Recommendations for Self-Esteem
The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown, Ph.D., LMSW
Self-Compassion by Kristin Neff, Ph.D.
Therapy is a tool that can help you strengthen your relationship with yourself.
You deserve to be kind to yourself and feel confident in your abilities.